RagHag Diva

Dissecting all the weekly trash celebrity magazines so YOU don't have to!

Monday, October 10, 2005

It's All Greek to Paris

Let me begin this my stating my Anti-Paris bias up-front. I cannot stand that she is a "celebrity." I don't want to go into it any further, except to say that I wholeheartedly enjoyed the South Park episode entitled Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset.

Okay - so she was 'engaged' to Paris Latsis, who's the Greek shipping heir to billions and billions of euros and who is a 'film producer' i.e. student at UCLA and looks a little smelly. So she dumped him, even though he 'bought' her a 24-carat engagement ring -- well, let me stop there, because it's a little unclear over who dumped whom. She's all saying "I love him but I am so young and I don't want to end up young and divorced and I'm just not ready." But the gossip rags are all pretty much saying that he dumped her because his parents were all like, 'Uh, if you marry that stupid spoiled whore you don't get no cash." So weigh the two scenarios and YOU decide what makes the most sense.

So the same day she releases this statement about loving Paris and he's my best friend yadda yadda, she's seen making out with ANOTHER Greek shipping heir to billions and billions of euros who's ALSO in film school, this time at USC and ALSO looks a little smelly. His name is Stavros Niarchos III. AND, he was recently dating the anorexic Olsen twin. That would be Mary-Kate. We'll see how long it takes HIS parents to pull the plug on this one. I predict 9 days.

Now, the big question: will the stupid spoiled whore keep the ring? First of all, he "gave" her two rings - a 25-carat white diamond engagement ring, and a 21-carat canary diamond "I love you" ring (vomit). So this is what People says: "According to a source close to Hilton, "She tried to give them back, but he loves her and wants her to keep them."

Right. I have two theories about these rings - the first being that this kid Paris Latsis didn't buy shit - according to all sources he has no money of his own. So there's no way he bought a ring from a gumball machine for her, let alone two multi-million dollar ones. Second, if he DID buy these for her, then he used his parents' money. And if he DID tell her to keep them because he loves her so, well, his parents will soon read about it in People and will say, "Uh, if you don't get those rings back from that stupid spoiled whore you don't get no cash." Either way, you won't see Paris H. wearing them again.

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