RagHag Diva

Dissecting all the weekly trash celebrity magazines so YOU don't have to!

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Examination of Earlier Stories, per Mama Diva's Request

Sorry I didn't post yesterday. I wasn't feeling too hot, but really there's nothing gossipy going on. I mean, if Angelina had her Namibian Pitt yesterday, you know I'd be all over that like a Buddhist Sanskrit tattoo on a left shoulder blade.

So since there's not a hell of a lot to report, and since Mother's Day is on Sunday, I thought I'd discuss a few things Mama Diva asked about. I LOVE The Mama Diva. Happy Mom's Day!

Katie Holmes' Prenup

London's Daily Mail ran a story this past weekend saying Katie's prenup entitles her to a cool $40 million should they fairytale end. Sounds like a good deal, right? Well, get this - the zombie gets $15 million even if they don't get married at all. Have you ever heard of someone getting a buttload of cash even if she pulls a Jennifer Wilbanks and ditches him at the altar (wink wink nod nod nudge nudge Katie)? Sounds like she's getting paid for having his kid, doesn't it? You know what? For $15 million I'd totally have a kid for Tom Cruise. I think Katie is crazy - crazy like a fox, don't you? I just may have to call her "Kate" from now on. Not because Tom Cruise wants me to (I love that he keeps telling the media to call her "Kate" and they keep calling her "Katie", by the way), but because girlfriend is a STEPFORD GENIUS!

Star Jones' Future On "The View"

Looks like Star's getting canned. Page Six says it was a condition of Rosie O'Donnell's hiring. AWESOME. Man do I hate Star Jones. I'm sure I said this before, but you know how people say, "She'd be such a pretty girl, if she just lost that darn weight!"? Well, turns out Star wasn't so pretty. She was way prettier when she was an extra-large woman. Everything about her makes me want to vomit - her product-placement, over the top wedding, her honeymoon in Dubai, her obviously gay husband, her 'I won't admit I had gastric bypass but I'll fess up to a boob job' mentality. I know we Divas are supposed to stick together, but Girlfriend gives Divas a bad rap. 10 bucks says she does a reality show with husband Gay Al.

Ashlee's Nose

Ashlee Simpson's huge-ass nose looks, well, less huge-ass. She ain't talking, but a picture of a less huge-ass nose is worth a thousand words.

Here's a side-by-side comparison.

Here's a pic of the old schnozz.

And, here's a pick of the new schnozz.


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