RagHag Diva

RagHagDiva.com is LIVE!

2006-09-12T20:34:00.000-07:00

Yes, www.raghagdiva.com is open for business!

Thanks for your patience. I promise to reward you with lots of Suri goodness.

New URL for RagHag

2006-09-05T20:19:00.000-07:00

Well, www.raghagdiva.com is not up quite yet.

However, I must report tomorrow's news - Photographic Evidence of Suri Cruise.

So because I am having so many problems with Blogger, I started another - you can find it here:

http://raghagdiva.wordpress.com/

I apologize for all the redirects - but RagHag needs to post the news with a reliable tool.

Heh. I said 'tool'.

Please visit me there - and you'll be rewarded with a picture of the alleged Suri Cruise.

Closed for Repairs

2006-09-03T13:11:00.000-07:00

Well, I haven't been updating much, due mostly to technical reasons (not to mention there's been no good dirt to dish lately - damn the month of August!) but I will be returning soon, with a brand new site, and a brand new URL:

www.raghagdiva.com

Keep checking in - I'll post a notice here when the new site is up and running!

Gyllenhaal Covers Up Bump

2006-08-22T12:03:00.000-07:00

Now Maggie. I know your pregnant. But it's no reason to shroud yourself in a burqa. It's August in America - you're allowed to show skin here.

Of course, you look 1,000 times better than your pregnant peer.

So THAT'S Why Kate Hudson's Getting a Divorce...

2006-08-16T12:33:00.000-07:00

... because she's a big SKANK!

She hooked up with Owen Wilson while filming "You, Me and Dupree".

“This is not a fling,” says a source close to the couple. “Kate is crazy about him. Owen gives her so much attention, and she loves it. [That’s why] she wants her marriage to be over.”

Dude Owen Wilson is a notorious player. But maybe he can help convince her that they need to cut her kid's hair.

They do look better together.

Breakup Alert!

2006-08-14T12:37:00.000-07:00

Kate Hudson and her Black Crowes husband, Chris Robinson, are splitzville.

I think it's because she wanted to cut their kid's hair and he refused.

Angie Moves Out

2006-08-09T12:26:00.001-07:00

Disclaimer: This info is from Star Magazine. There is probably a 4.7 percent chance that this is true.

Angelina Jolie moved out of Brad's Malibu home, with all three kids in tow.

Star says she went to the Hotel Bel Air. But I think she would have gone to the Beverly Hills Hotel, where her mom is staying.

Angie Moves Out

2006-08-09T12:26:00.000-07:00

Move Over, Mel - Robin's Joining Ya...

2006-08-09T12:20:00.000-07:00

Now Robin Williams is entering rehab. For alcoholism.

I can't believe it's not for coke.

Cruise's Ex Cruz Sees Baby Cruise

2006-08-03T16:48:00.000-07:00

Penelope Cruz, the ex-girlfriend of Tom Cruise, has come out saying she's seen Suri.

Sorry, Tom. You're gonna have to do better than that.

I believe Penelope, like Nicole, is under a strict contract with Tom. I mean, come on - she dated him for three years and no smack talk? I could almost forgive Nicole, cuz she has kids with the man. But Penelope has nothing to lose...

Or does she?

"She's really beautiful. She's one of the most beautiful babies I've ever seen," the 32-year-old actress said.

I know everyone says babies are beautiful, even when they are not. But the quotes from the three chosen wise women, Cruz, Jada Pinkett Smith, and Leah Remini, are eerily similar. Even the AP article implies so:

Pinkett Smith has described Suri as "one of the sweetest babies I've ever met in my life," while Remini has said the baby "looks like Tom and Katie, she's just beautiful."

If this baby's so perfect I say bring her out of hiding! Show the mere mortals what a beautiful sweet baby you have.

I dare ya, Tom!

Mel Gibson Overload

2006-08-03T09:31:00.000-07:00

I apologize for not posting yesterday. Seems that if one is exposed to too many Drunk Mel Gibson stories, one develops a sort of twitch, not unlike an epileptic seizure, and thus cannot post entries to one's celebrity trash blog.

But there is good news out there in Gossipwood. Star Jones Reynolds is not, I repeat NOT, getting a divorce from her gay husband.

Well thank god and hallelujah! I had almost forgotten about ol' Star. Okay, we can all go on with our lives. Carry on.

Mel Gibson Hates the Jews, Loves the Sauce

2006-07-31T14:46:00.000-07:00

Wow. Mel Gibson is in TROUBLE!

Pulled over for drunk driving. Saying crazy shit about the Jews.

What do you think? Is his career over?

The best source to follow this story is definitely tmz.com - they even have a video clip of a PSA Gibson did for the Los Angeles Sheriff's Department, and clips from his interview with Diane Sawyer where he says it's against his religion to be anti-semitic and he used to drive drunk, but that's when he was stupid.

Waxy Baby

2006-07-27T09:28:00.000-07:00

This pic was out yesterday, and I was going to write about it then, but it was just too disturbing.

After twisting and turning all night with visions of the wax family in my head, I decided I should just get it out there and hopefully excise it from my brain.

Another So-Called Suri Sighting

2006-07-27T09:16:00.000-07:00

Tom Cruise has paid yet another "celebrity" to rave about his "child", Suri.

Jada Pinkett Smith has seen the imaginary child twice, and calls her "gorgeous" and "Daddy's little girl."

Whatever. I'm not taking the word of someone who got her start on the "Cosby Show" spinoff "A Different World." Now if it were Dwayne Wayne saying it, then maybe. But tomboy Lena James? Sorry. Try again.

Besides, look at her. She used to be a beautiful woman. She's obviously gone over the deep end, never to return. We're gonna believe this person?

Tori Gets Screwed

2006-07-26T14:34:00.000-07:00

Out of the $500 million fortune her father left behind, Tori Spelling gets less than $1 million.

She better start cutting coupons. Hitting the Wal-Mart. Selling her plasma.

Lance is OUT!

2006-07-26T12:11:00.000-07:00

Lance Bass told People that he is gay, and in a long-term relationship with Reichen Lehmkuhl, who won The Amazing Race a few seasons ago.

Lance, I just want to tell you how happy I am for you. First of all, great choice going with People to disclose your news. You know the rags very well, obviously. If it's in People, it's true.

Second, great choice in a boyfriend. That Reichen is h-o-t HOT.

Third, you always were my favorite 'N Syncer. I even saw your movie, On The Line. I had a little crush on you - totally thought you were hot. I should have known then that you were gay. I always fall for the gay ones.

Fourth, and most importantly, I'm so glad you said this:

"The thing is, I'm not ashamed — that's the one thing I went to say. I don't think it's wrong, I'm not devastated going through this. I'm more liberated and happy than I've been my whole life. I'm just happy."

You will be even happier now that you don't have to hide who you are. You're gonna thrive, baby!

Mazel Tov!

"I'm Sorry I'm a Dirty Dog Pervert!"

2006-07-25T13:37:00.000-07:00

Peter Cook apologized to Christie Brinkley through his lawyer to NYPost's Cindy Adams.

"I love my wife. I have loved her since the day I met her. Please . . . I love her."

That's why he banged his 19 year old assistant, plus a couple other teenage girls. Cuz he loves his wife.

Then he said, "For a lifetime I've tried to prove how much I love her. This is an aberration."

Aberration? He's been chasing after the girl since she was 17. And I like how he says he's been trying to prove how much he loves Christie. Like someone she has insecurities and trust issues and so he had to go have sex with teenage girls.

If she goes back to him, she's insane.

RagHag Roundup: Star Gets it Wrong! (Again)

2006-07-24T13:01:00.000-07:00

Star Magazine yet again published totally incorrect information as if it were fact.

P. 15 - Couples News

ON! Carmen Electra and Dave Navarro

Carmen Electra, 34, and Dave Navarro, 39, are going strong despite rumors. In fact, the sexy actress tells Star that she "would like to have a baby in 2008. It's a huge commitment, and I want to enjoy being married for a little bit first."

Uh, enjoy being married to whom, Carmen? Cuz we all know you put your "career" ahead of spending time with your husband.

RagHag Roundup: Nicole Richie Shopped Til She Dropped

2006-07-24T13:00:00.000-07:00

Oh man - I was SO CLOSE to witnessing this in person.

So Nicole Richie fainted while shopping at Kitson on July 15th.

I was there July 14th! Damn it to hell! All I got was a glimpse Brittany Murphy!

She was browsing and BAM! Hit the floor. The staff offered her food, to which she shouted an ambiguous "NO!" but did accept a glass of calorie-free water. 20 minutes later, she was good as new.

Okay - maybe that's optimistic. How about this: 20 minutes later, she was upright on her matchstick legs and fairly mobile, considering her complete lack of muscle tone.

RagHag Roundup: Lance May As Well Wear a Suit of Rainbow Flags

2006-07-24T12:59:00.000-07:00

In Star's Sightings column, page 39:

Former *NSYNC boy bander Lance Bass and three guy friends howling and clapping at comedian Kathy Griffin's gay-joke-filled stand-up show at the Wiltern Theater in L.A. on July 13.

Kathy, Lance Bass is one of your gays! This is HUGE - you must capitalize on this. I mean, come on - he may as well officially come out of the closet.

"Three guy friends"! LMAO!

RagHag Roundup: If it Weren't for my Pension, I'd Kick Your Ass!

2006-07-24T12:50:00.000-07:00

So remember how I mentioned that the uber-beautiful Christie Brinkley is getting a divorce from her equally white-toothed husband, Peter Cook? You've probably heard the reason: teen sex.

Her husband is a perv/typical man who decided to cheat on his 52 year old wife with a 19 year old girl. And how did Christie find out? According to People, the girl's stepfather approached the couple after Christie's commencement address at Southampton High School and told her.

The girl's stepfather, Brian Platt is a Southampton Village police office, and according to Life&Style, he said to Cook, in front of Brinkley, "If I weren't worried about my pension, you'd be a dead man."

Damn you, pension! [shaking fist to the air]

Hey Brian - it's called civil litigation. You won't have to worry about your pension, dude.

RagHag Roundup: What's Wrong with Baby Suri

2006-07-24T08:14:00.000-07:00

I have to give props to Star for coming up with the best headline of the week:

"What's Wrong with Baby Suri - & Why is Katie Hiding Her?"

Doesn't it give you chills??? Elephant Baby!!

So you get to the story, and a bunch of it discusses Katie's brushes with stalkercrazies, and that's why we haven't seen Suri. But then, in a little sidebar, another reason is given - one I haven't thought about and one that could make sense.

Their "experts" have surmised that there is nothing seriously wrong with Suri cuz if there was, she would have to have gone to a hospital at some point, and there aren't any sighting of her there (uh, I guess their "experts" have never heard of doctor-patient confidentiality). So what they think is that Suri never got immunizations - Scientologists don't believe in protecting against whooping cough - and they could be keeping her out of the public in order for her immune system to strengthen before being exposed to the outside world.

So this is a pretty good explanation, right? One that could hold water. But then why, if Leah Remini is such a good Scientologist that she was the 'chosen one' to view Suri, why then would she pose with her newborn for the cover of any rag that would have her? Why, Leah? Why? Do you want your baby to catch polio? Or are you like a fair-weather Scientologist and went ahead and got the shots? Only a Scientologist while it's convenient, like when you're asked by Tom Cruise to lie to the world about holding his "baby"?

(By the way - that is not, I repeat NOT, a picture of Suri with Leah Remini. That's her own baby, the one with either the immunizations or bacterial meningitis.)

Britney Gets a New Manny

2006-07-20T12:01:00.000-07:00

This one isn't as high school quarterbackie as the last one, but he's WAY better than K-Fed.

Course, that ain't much of a compliment. I mean, most homeless guys have a leg up on Federline.

Britney could actually be cute here, if her strap wasn't hanging off her shoulder. Poor thing - she just can't get her shit together.

THIS is Ashlee Simpson??

2006-07-20T11:56:00.000-07:00

Check out this pic from People.com.

She totally doesn't look like herself. I mean, she looks tons better, cuz let's be honest, she was kind of a dog. But it's really weird - now she doesn't look like anything.

It freaking me out, to be honest. She looks like a second-tier host on Extra!

Semi-Famous Scientologist Claims She Saw Suri

2006-07-20T11:49:00.000-07:00

Leah Remini says she saw Suri.

"She's a beaming baby. She looks like Tom and Katie. She's just beautiful," the King of Queens 'star' told People.

Bullshit.

Those Scientologists will say anything to support the lies that are told. That's what the "religion" is all about. Holds no water with me.

None of us will be satisfied until we see the kid. Am I right, people??